Head above water

I'm back! To be fair, I've actually felt well enough to write for 3 or 4 days or so, but I've been a slacker. So sue me. To begin, I want to give a heartfelt thanks to Maryann and Jen for sending me books. They get an A+ not only for content, but for speed. How you managed to get books to me that fast, I'll never know. Thank you ladies. You rock.

I am doing well, but the chemo was pretty tough. I was completely wiped on Thursday and Friday as well as mildly crummy on Saturday. Now, however, I have recovered pretty well. The nausea has subsided as well as most of the tiredness I feel, and I even managed to run all of my errands yesterday without incurring a fever. The title of this blog refers more to my emotional state. I won't lie to everyone, this is a struggle. I am struggling emotionally. This is hard. But I take it one day at a time, one piece at a time, and I make it through each day.

One of the purposes of this blog has always been to provide accurate, widespread information to my families and friends so that there is no misinformation. Therefore, I want to restate some facts so that everyone is on the same page.

First, the old facts:

1. I have Hodgkins lymphoma- That's the good kind. Hodgkin's lymphoma is one of the most curable kinds of cancer. Despite this current setback, I have very good odds of beating this and being cured. My odds are somewhere up there in the 80th percentile. That's not bad. If you don't trust me, feel free to go online to the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society and Website and read all about it.
2. So far I have been through 6 months of treatment called ABVD. I have never had any radiation. Note: since I responded really well to the ABVD treatment, I have much better odds of being cured from these treatments. It's not fail proof, but there is reason for optimism.

New Facts:

1. I am currently going through a chemotherapy regime called ICE, which I will take every two weeks, approximately 3-4 cycles. The purpose of this chemo is to shrink the cancer.
2. If the chemo I am on currently does it's job, I will go through a barrage of tests to make sure that I am up to having a bone marrow/stem cell transplant.
3. Assuming I am green lighted for the stem cell transplant, two weeks or so after my last ICE treatment, I will have my stem cells harvested at UCLA, an outpatient process which takes anywhere from 2-7 days.
4. Once they have enough stem cells, they will put me in the hospital at UCLA and give me really high dose chemotherapy which will knock my immune system down to nothing, and then they will give me back my own stem cells to help me recover. I will be in the hospital for approximately three weeks. The first 5 days are for chemo, and the next 10+ days will be for recovery of my immune system. If everything goes to plan, this could take place as early as December.

Whew. A lot of information, I know. You may have gleaned this on your own, but in case you didn't, this is going to be a very rough couple of months for Justin and I. Brutal might even be a more accurate description. We need your support, and we will be asking for it in different ways.

Please pray for us. Pray that I am delivered from this disease. Pray for the doctors and nurses and the insurance people. Pray that I respond to this ICE treatment. Pray that I am strong enough to receive the transplant. And give thanks for your life and for the blessing of your own health. You never know what's going to happen tomorrow.

I love all of you.