I feel loved

Before I get to the root of my blog today, I want to be honest and admit that I am scared. Next week, I'll learn if my salvage chemo is working and if I am on the road to getting the stem cell transplant. Probably the hardest thing about this process is the waiting because it's hard to stop your mind from running through all the possibilities. I really hope that I have good news to deliver soon, and in the mean time I will be trying to keep my mind elsewhere.

Now...for the rest of the story. You know, one of the few advantages of getting sick (and there are few) is that they are one of the opportunities in life where you really fully experience how much you love and are loved by others. It's just one of those inevitable things about the situation that people feel moved to express how they feel. As for me, I have no doubt that I am so very loved by my family and friends, and it means everything to me.

One group in particular I would like to note is the church. You know, the church (universal)gets a really bad rap these days for various reasons, but there is nothing like the love and support of church family through difficult times. I am lucky to have several church families that think about me and support me. To begin, there is OCPC, which is made up of people who have loved me through thick and thing and supported me practically all my life. Sometimes the faces change, but their love never waivers, and they have always been for me a powerful example of the love of Christ lived out.

In addition, there is St. Stephen Presbyterian church in Chatsworth. For those of you who might be unaware, I worked there for a year as a middle school youth intern, but had leave the position for various reasons. However, during that time I made many friends and grew to love the community there. Now, I have not attended services there for over a year, but still my friends from that body pray for me, email me, and keep in contact. It's an amazing and humbling thing, and I am so grateful for their love too.

It's been almost 9 years since my mother was first diagnosed with her cancer, which in and of itself is hard to believe. It's my belief that around the time she was diagnosed, she was feeling unappreciated....just like many of us often do. She had two teenagers, notoriously ungrateful, as well as a demanding job and chores at home. I think that one of the good things that came out of my mom's illness is that she learned just how much people cared about her.

I have mentioned several times in my blog that we ought to be more grateful, and I say that because I believe that it shouldn't take illness for us to express our love for those we care about. I think it's important to really take the energy to express how we feel before we experience crisis. So....you know what to do.

Peace out.