Well, we're still waiting to get the bone marrow test results back to see if my cells come back normal. Waiting sucks. That's about the only thing I can say about it. My transplant coordinator seems optimistic, whereas the doctor just sort of shrugged and said, "We'll see." Not the kind of interaction that most engenders confidence. I waiver between confidence and despair, and I suffer all the ups and downs which come from riding the roller coaster. My gut instinct is that these cells are going to come back normal, but my Eeyore side pushes me to brace for the worst. When I know what's what I will post it, but likely if it's not the news I want I will then curl up into a fetal position for a while.
Of course, when I start to feel sorry for myself, I have to be reminded that things could be much worse. I always meet people in waiting rooms, and yesterday in the midst of a 3 hour wait to see the doctor I met a 25 year old woman who has aggressive b-cell lymphoma, as well as a husband and a 2 year old. She's hoping to get a stem cell transplant too. I can't even imagine trying to do this while also being a stay at home mom to a 2 year old. Her name is Sharla if anyone would like to add her to your prayer lists.
The moral of the story is that life isn't fair, but it is beautiful.
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